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For some artists, the last year of increased solitude offered an opportunity to step into their craft and be more prolific and creative than ever before. For others, it presented a debilitating pit of emotional and physical quicksand, making it nearly impossible to get through the day, much less create anything. Kaylan Waterman, aka Vespre, landed somewhere in between the two. Her latest single and first solo release in almost three years comes after a long period of collaborating, resting, reflecting and rediscovering her muse. \u201cBack to Me<\/a>\u201d is a buoyant reunion with Spring, self and love lost and found; and one that Waterman worked damn hard to get to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI know a lot of people who are like, \u2018I made my magnum opus during COVID!\u2019 That was not me, at all,\u201d says Waterman. \u201cI tried a couple of times and my body, my spirit just told me: Don\u2019t even stress about it, but this isn\u2019t it for you… focus on other stuff.\u201d So, that\u2019s what she did. Waterman, who works full time at local label, artist management and sync company Assemble Sound<\/a>, already has enough on her plate to tire anyone out. But, on top of working full time and collaborating with her brother Kaleb the Intern<\/a>, Moon King<\/a>, and others in 2020, she started a sharing table<\/a> in her neighborhood to provide food and other necessities to folks in the community.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n While Waterman devoted her time and energy to filling other people\u2019s plates, her\u2019s was running low. \u201cI just did not have it in me to create. I was too stressed, I was too sad, I was grieving, I was just like in survival mode,\u201d Waterman explains. \u201cI felt very depleted and music was the only thing I knew that would help fill me up.\u201d So she started writing for herself, meeting at the cross-section of heartbreak and healing.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n Waterman explains that the idea for \u201cBack to Me\u201d started almost as a clapback to peoples\u2019 responses to her breakup. She says that although she\u2019s the one who walked away from her relationship, everyone assumed she was dumped. \u201cI would tell people, and they\u2019d be like, ‘I\u2019m so sorry, he\u2019s the worst!’\u201d Waterman says. \u201cAnd I\u2019m like, \u2018umm, maybe I\u2019m the worst…What are you talking about? I ended this.\u2019\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n The song allowed Waterman to reclaim her narrative and communicate the complex array of emotions that can accompany a breakup. She wanted to portray the duality of being resolute in her decision but still feeling loss and grief. \u201cI just wanted people to know that women \u2013 especially independent, very self aware women \u2013 can make difficult decisions and still be soft and longing and wanting. We hold both of those things at the same.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n Waterman embodies this duality in \u201cBack to Me.\u201d Though her poetic lyrics focus on nostalgia and longing for a former lover, the music that accompanies them is upbeat, driven by shiny synths and ebullient percussion. The video (co-directed by herself and Andrew Miller) mixes the ethereal and the mundane, showing Waterman as both a serene nature goddess and a forlorn bodega shopper. Though she\u2019s feeling the ripple effects of heartbreak, Waterman refuses to hide from her complicated emotions, and is determined to dance through it all.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n